Washed canvas dad cap, olive
Posidonia Defense League
Embroidered cap for the imaginary paramilitary unit defending seagrass meadows from yacht anchors.
The roast
Posidonia oceanica is the seagrass that makes Balearic water look like Caribbean water. It's a hundred-thousand-year-old organism, a UNESCO World Heritage feature, and illegal to anchor on. People anchor on it constantly. The joke is the gap between "obviously you don't shred a UNESCO heritage site" and the daily summer reality of the Ibiza-Formentera channel.
The receipt
A page on what Posidonia is, why it matters (oxygen, sand production, fish nurseries), and what an anchor scar actually looks like. Ten percent of revenue goes to a verified marine conservation org — the shortlist is Posidonia Project, IbizaPreservation, and Save Posidonia Project.
Material
Six-panel washed canvas cap, unstructured. 100% organic cotton. Adjustable metal buckle. Made in EU.
Care
Spot clean. Don't machine wash — it'll lose its shape.
The rest of the drop
Helicopter Class
Heritage members'-club crest for people who helicopter to Formentera for lunch.
[PRVRS]
World's first post-hyperclub. Pronounced 'perverse.' For everyone without a table reservation.
200% Ibiza
Stencil-stamped souvenir tee for people who feel one hundred per cent isn't quite enough.
Sunset Removal Service
Chest-pocket badge for the fictional company that removes sunset-influencers from Cala d'Hort.
Temporada
The earnest one. For seasonal workers — bartenders, kitchen staff, taxi drivers, lifeguards, gardeners.